The other day I had some friends over. I asked their opinion about where on the fence I should hang this plant bag called a Wooly Pocket. Here's how it went:
Me: Okay, so, what do you think, right here?
Lindsay: Wait, where do you put the plant?
Me: Right in this bag, you put in soil, then the plant.
Lindsay: Does it even hold water? What kind of material is this? (makes yucky face).
Me: It's made out of recycled plastic bottles. There's a special watering system, like this... (I explain stuff. Friends look skeptical. They discuss alternate watering strategies that would work better).
Gary: Did someone give that to you?
Lindsay: Did you choose that color?
Me: I actually paid money for this, on the Internet.
Lindsay: So you didn't know it would look like that.
Me: Guys, stay on task. Just tell me where to put it.
Gary: You know what you should buy? One of those up-side-down pots where you grow tomatoes. Up-side-down. Those are cool.
(Long argument between Lindsay and Gary about whether such a thing really exists. Gary settles it with his iPhone. It really does exist.)
Lindsay: You need two of those bags, right there, one right on top of the other.
Me: Well, I just have this one.
Lindsay: You need another one.
Gary: Why do you have to put a plant on your wall?
Me: Um...
Lindsay: Why don't you put it over there? (points to a totally different wall, which receives no sunlight, ever)
Gary: Yeah, put it over there (points to sunless wall) and then you can buy one of these up-side-down strawberry pots to hang there (shows me an iPhone picture of one).
*****
If I lived in California, I think the conversation would have gone like this:
Me: Okay, so, what do you think, right here?
Friends: Yeah, that looks good.
Me: Sweet!
Friends: (amongst themselves, after leaving my place) : That was a pretty wretched looking plant bag, right?
Yeah, she totally should have bought one of those up-side- down tomato kits.
awesome.
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